WEAK KNEES

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In His hands, it became more than enough. Whether it be talent, time or treasure, it is when we give them to Jesus that our resources are multiplied.

Matthew 14:19-21

July 16, 2019

A rough start to my time of quiet but in the end, God spoke and how thankful I am that He did!

With my good morning prayer finished, two thoughts lit upon my mind:

“When God is silent.”

“If you don’t sit down to write, nothing will happen.”

My response:

“I don’t like to think of God as silent; For an hour and a half, YOU have been silent! I will not settle for this! I will dig in deeper because I’m not coming away from this moment without You. Your Word says that even before you made the world, YOU loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in your eyes (Ephesians 1:4). That is some kind of love and when you love someone that much, you cannot deny them! So, I will wait patiently and expectantly for You! You know how much time I have to spare this morning due to a work commitment. I know you will come forth! You are always with us, you never fail us, so you will not abandon this time of quiet! Thank you, Jesus, in advance!”

It wasn’t until the last half hour that God spoke!
Hallelujah!
To imagine a time with God as silent is truly disheartening.

I wrote this in my journal:

I am enabled by the Lord Jesus, therefore, weakness should not be an issue.

This is what He said:

“When your knees are weak, you are looking at your own strength instead of mine. I did not give you a spirit of fear and timidity but of power, love, and self-discipline (2 Timothy 1:7). Timothy (2 Timothy 2:6, 7) was experiencing great opposition to his message and to himself as a leader. Paul urged him to be bold. When you allow people to intimidate you, you neutralize your effectiveness in the things I have for you. The power of the Holy Spirit can help you overcome your fear of what some might say or do so that you can continue on with My call, your mission.

So, when praying, don’t feel intimidated–know that the power of the Holy Spirit is within you. He will give you the words to say. He will help you! He will bring to your remembrance the things He’s taught you (John 14:26) while you are in prayer with another. When you look at your weak knees you sink, just as Peter did (Matthew 14:22-33).

Immediately, call out to Me! Draw near to Me and I will draw near to you (James 4:8)! You will not sink!

Don’t get critical in your prayer! Don’t wish you would have said this or that! Again, this is taking your eyes off Me and back onto your weak knees.

Refocus!

I know the needs of the people who come to you for prayer! You do not! Quit looking for praise or validation when finished because this will be all you receive! Instead, thank Me!

Before and after, thank Me.

The power (Acts 1:8) you will receive from the Holy Spirit includes courage, boldness, confidence, insight, ability, and authority. You will need all these gifts to fulfill your mission. Believe in Me as your Savior and you will experience the power of the Holy Spirit in your life.

July 19, 2019

The Lord continues to teach me:

“You are still trying to do My work in your own strength! There is no victory in this!”

I did not pray before the prayer group last night. I chose to read Google News instead. I did not ask for God’s help. I did not ask what He’d like me to pray about.

I came into my office, my quiet space, five minutes before the prayer phonecall. I said a quick “something” and then dialed in.

I felt okay at the beginning but as the prayers of others continued, the enemy fired up his darts and consistently threw them at me; I allowed them to penetrate! The longer I remained silent, the more difficult it became to speak. I had no intention of praying but my name was called and in my heart, I did not want Satan to win. I had to say something! What came out was a human effort, no spirit whatsoever! I had to force the words out; they were not rivers of living water.

It was terrible!

I’m looking to you, Lord, for understanding and growth. How can I be better than I was yesterday?

This is what He told me:

“You are not listening to me! You willy nilly through prayer, using your mind instead of your heart. The gate is through praise and thanks to Me. You try to be like the others when they pray. This will never accomplish anything because you are different. They are different. Nobody prays the same because I work differently in each of you.

Don’t pretend! Speak what’s in your heart!
Don’t follow ‘rules!’ Speak what’s in your heart!
Listen to me!”

My response to Him:

“I’m afraid to speak what’s in my heart because people will see sadness, inadequacy, and self-centeredness. The prayer will be about me and it should be about You and others.”

“Speak what’s in your heart; I will put the spin on it! Make a choice–make a conscious effort to pause and listen to your heart. What is it saying and then say it? Don’t worry about what comes out of your mouth. If you are right with me, if you are praying from a clean heart, whatever comes out will be right and good and from Me. 

It’s like switching from the left hemisphere to the right hemisphere. Remember this teaching? The practice you’ve done in order to go from analytical thinking to creative thinking? Do the same thing with your mind and heart. Most importantly, come to Me first! Seek Me first! If you don’t, you will have more experiences like you did last night!

Seek the Kingdom of God about all else, live righteously and I will give you everything you need (Matthew 6:33).

Paul shared (1 Corinthians 2:1-5) the simple message of Jesus Christ. He allowed the Holy Spirit to guide his words. He knew the Holy Spirit would give power to his words and use them to bring glory to God. Paul’s confidence, in speaking, was his knowledge of the Holy Spirit which is to help and guide us as we fulfill our mission for God.”

In my journal I wrote:

I would have given up a long time ago. I am one that has always given up. If something was too difficult and my level of comfort became unmanageable, I gave up and quickly moved on to something else. Something easier! I have been told this and I guess I’ve lived it throughout the course of my life.

This one thing, the call to prayer with others, will not allow me to give up. The Holy Spirit continues to supply all the things I need to keep moving forward. In my mind, I want to give up. I want to swipe everything off my desk and scream:

“I QUIT!”

My heart will not let me do this. My hearts says:

“You don’t really want to give up. You want this and you believe this is what God wants and because God wants this, you want this too. You know, deep down in your heart, the victory–in Christ–is yours. You know God’s plan for you is for good and not disaster (Jeremiah 29:11). You know this is the season of discipleship. You know that you are in the way. Your ideas are in the way. You stop progress because you won’t open your hand and surrender. You do not have the final say. You don’t have control. You don’t know what’s best because when you exert your own ideas, control and what’s best in that particular situation, where do you always find yourself?”

Lost
Empty
Alone
Mute
Hopeless
Helpless
Human

Oswald Chambers (The Worker):

“He will do with you what He is not doing with other people. Let Him have His way.”

This process–this prayer call–is the one thing in my life that I’ve stuck with. I proceed because my Father provides. He gives me just what I need to keep me moving towards Him.

He never fails!
He never abandons!
He is always with me!

Oswald Chambers (The Worker):

“All God’s men are ordinary men made extraordinary by the matter He has given them.”

I DO NOT WANT TO BE ORDINARY!!!

***

Thank you, Jesus!

Inspired by A.T. Thank you!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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