Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.
II Corinthians 1:3,4 (NKJV)
I am feeling troubled, heavy and sad this morning. My motivation and joy for a new day has been decimated and I have no idea why. The outlook is bleak, without a hope or any encouragement. I sat up in bed and tried to figure out why I was feeling glum and attributed it to my hormones and to deprivation of foods that I enjoy (to be explained in another post).
In the very back of my mind I was also feeling missed opportunities with a possible new job, prayer with a friend, and rejection (no relation to one another).
My husband did his best to shake me out of my melancholy mood. He even took some extra time this morning to talk and hold me. I know he meant well and I do appreciate his efforts. He left for work but shortly after he sent a text that he was on his way back. When he walked through the door, he had flowers in hand and a smile upon his face! His mornings are stressful and hectic. He is a man of many work responsibilities but yet he took time out from his busy morning to stop at the store, purchase flowers and bring them back to me. Not a lick of stress or frustration on his face. He is a good man and a terrific father and he has always provided for his family! I am blessed! Not only by him but by his entire family. I failed to recognize this, in this moment, because I’m completely consumed by my own funk of emotions.
I know that my Source, Strength and Comfort all come from God. No amount of french toast or chocolate will give me what my Lord and Savior gives me every second of the day, if I would only give Him the chance. I would normally grow so weak and vulnerable that I would turn to those lovely foods but I’ve since learned that they only provide instant gratification and what comes after is complete torture, mentally.
Taken from my journal entry this morning:
I use food to boost my mood. I’m forced (by my own will) to rely on You and that’s good. I do not want to put You second because You are not! I pray to You and ask You to take control of my sad feelings, what I am currently interpreting as missed opportunities and food deprivation (currently fasting). I don’t want them. I want You and all that You have for me. Sometimes I just need a little extra reassurance as you faithfully provided last week.
I feel that this time with you (this morning) is a teaching moment! You are showing me how to rely on You instead of outside things such as jobs, education, food and other people? If I don’t learn to rely on you in times of sadness then I will end up back in destructive behavior patterns. You comfort me and I comfort them, all in the Name of Jesus!
I grabbed the New King James Version of “God’s Promises For Your Every Need” and looked up “comfort.” I was pointed to the above Scripture. I felt a tiny bit of peace but was desperate for more. I took some time to meditate and listen to God in regards to His Scripture. I read the interpretations from both the New Living Testament and the English Standard Version. I was bound and determined to learn from God how I can rely on Him in times of discomfort and struggle. I have a tendency to feel low from time to time and I’m sick of turning to things that have no power! I was going to learn and I was going to act. I want to feel comforted by Him and I want to comfort others through Him.
I found a message by Dr. Charles Stanley called, “Down But Not Out.” It was televised by InTouch Ministries on the 20th of October, 2017. Dr. Stanley was telling of how Paul got back up when he was stoned to death. You can find this in Acts 7:57,58. Basically, he was able to get back up because he reflected on his Salvation, Conviction and Confidence (excellent message and I recommend you watch it in its entirety).
Dr. Stanley suggests that we meditate on why we are feeling down and then remind ourselves that we don’t have to stay there!
I applied this wisdom to my current situation and this is what I came up with and this is how I got back up.
First and foremost, I did turn to God. I grabbed His resources, prayed and then read. He took over from there. He brought me to His Scripture on comfort, He spoke to me and helped me understand what it was that I was reading. He pointed me to Charles Stanley’s message. Through all of this, He was faithfully with me. I could feel His presence and I could feel His comfort. I could hear His words.
I took a moment to be silent before Him so that I could decipher just what it was that I was feeling and why.
I want something good to eat:
This will not last if you do have something good to eat (junky foods). It is instant gratification! It doesn’t sustain you and you will feel terrible afterwards, all over!! The Lord is lasting!! Feed on His Word. He will fill you with all good things. Tell Him your desire to eat and why. Ask Him to remove it and replace it with Him. Don’t eat for comfort. There is no solution in this!!
I feel rejection:
You are putting self-worth in others. It doesn’t matter what they think. What matters is your relationship to God. How can you serve God and people today? How can you make a difference in God’s Kingdom? What He presents to you is a gift. You are to share what He is doing in your life. You will probably never know who feels His impact. It is not what you do or say or write that delivers the impact! It is what the Holy Spirit says and does to the person on the other side.
I feel like I’ve missed out on a job opportunity:
You love your residents, coworkers, and the building. The community is small and everyone knows each other. It’s comfortable. Your schedule is flexible (thanks to your supervisor) so you can focus on God, serving, and your writing. Your fulfillment in your current job comes from the residents. They make you feel good. You are valued and they depend on you to care, encourage and love them.
And so, my children, listen to me,
for all who follow my ways are joyful.
Listen to my instruction and be wise.
Don’t ignore it.
Joyful are those who listen to me,
watching for me daily at my gates,
waiting for me outside my home!
For whoever finds me finds life
and receives favor from the Lord.
But those who miss me injure themselves.
All who hate me love death.
I am confident that God is with me–teaching, loving, saving, and guiding. He has a plan and purpose for me and I want to get up and carry on. I want to be a godly example. A child of God is allowed to feel down. It is normal and natural but we need to get back up by turning to Him and relying on Him. Remember who He is, what He has done and what He will do.
Lord–I thank You for Your time this morning! I need You daily! In times of sadness and in times of joy. You are my Strength and my Source and I wouldn’t be where I am today if it weren’t for You. I live joyfully today because of You. You have comforted me this morning just as your word says. You truly are Amazing.
Lord–I ask that you touch the ones that are in need of comfort today. I ask that you wrap your mighty arms around them and overwhelm them with your Presence as you did for me today. There is nothing on this earth that compares to you. I praise you, I worship you, I love you and I thank you!
In Jesus’ Name, Amen.